Becoming the Best Me

I had this photo pop up on Facebook this week from three years ago. It was a “memory” that it wanted me to share on my page. I didn’t share it, and I usually don’t because I get tired of seeing everyone else’s “memories” from years ago.

This photo that I took three years ago was a great reminder. My daughter and I ran a 5K race that took place on a farm that had a pumpkin patch. Their pumpkins were sold by the pound, so they had a wheelbarrow with 100 pounds of pumpkins in it to give you an idea of what 100 pounds of pumpkins looked like.

After just losing 100 pounds, I had to have a photo with it. It was a great example, a reminder of how far I’d come, and a reminder of where I’d been.

This is what me with 100 less pounds looks like!

What no one tells you is that losing weight is as much mental as it is physical. The obvious things come to mind such as changing your habits and dealing with the cravings and your saboteur. But no one tells you about your mental image of yourself.

No one tells you that if your body changes quickly, it may take a while for your brain to catch up. If you lose weight rapidly, your mind still has the image of the heavier you. This is why you might put on clothing that is way too big without realizing that you are now a smaller size.

I think anyone that is trying to lose weight also has an image in their mind of what they will look like at their goal weight. As I got closer to my goal weight, I realized that my body wasn’t going to look anything like I had hoped. Yes, it was smaller, but it was also becoming wrinkly and flabby. It was to be expected, but it was still disheartening.

Three years ago, this put the brakes on my weight loss journey. I still had 50 pounds to go to my goal weight, and the thought of what was to come was not something my brain was ready to handle. So, I let it simmer. And simmer. And simmer. Until the pot was dry.

My weight slowly crept up. Over the course of about 18 months, I gained about 40 pounds. About 11 months ago, I decided that I had had enough. There was no way I was going back to where I was when this all started. My mind had finally caught up with my body. The added weight was making everything so much harder, and I was now okay with how my body was probably going to look once I reached my goal weight.

Me + 100 pounds

So, here I am, back to where I was three years ago, and I’m ok with that. For the first time in a long time, I’m ok with where I am and where I’m going. Bright Line Eating has been great for quieting my mind. For the first time, I can see clearly where I’m going, and I’m ok with that. It’s not originally what I had envisioned, but it’s the best I can be!

And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in real knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve the things that are excellent, in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ; having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which [comes] through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

Philipians 1:9-11

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